My Personal Philosophy...
... If you can't spell, pronounce, or otherwise identify it, DON'T EAT IT
... If two or more of its ingredients cannot be obtained in non-powdered form,
DON'T
EAT
IT
... In other words, if your food is not made of food,
DON'T EAT IT
This orange creamsicle cake monstrosity assaulted me with a most pungent chemical aroma. I was at least three feet away. It smelled like orange-clean-your-toilet-bowl spray. I gagged. Really. I did. Then I had to get in close to get a picture. I put my olfactory neurons on the line for my journalistic (food-alistic?) integrity. Hope you can all appreciate my sacrifice.
Check out what I can only assume to be trans-fat globules on the corrugated tin material of the container. Gag.
I am done ranting now. Thank you for your time and attention.
4 comments:
I'm so glad the word creamsicle is not in rotation in Britain. I hate it; it makes me cringe and think of tacky sex shops. I don't want to think about why, thank you.
I actually have no clue what creamsicle cake *shudder* is, but it looks like sloppy mashed potato with some kind of fake cheese product dandruff. Were you actually eating in a place that sold this? Or is your dedication to foodalism(?) such that you really went out of your way to bring this monstrosity to your readers? (By readers I mean adoring fans, obviously.)
I once worked in (food) product development. It was basically a kitchen and lab in one. There were things that if you dropped on the floor, would eat the floor. It was sketchy stuff, lemme tell ya!
Aimee - The tacky sex shop cake was from a grocery store. One of my lab mates brought it in for everyone to share. Very nice gesture, very digusting cake. Adoring fans. Hee.
Rachael - That is terrifying. It really is.
It's absurd what manufacturers can get away with. Something about "natural flavors" not being actually derived from the food they emulate - just a chemical compound that approximates it. Is that right?
This makes me think of Clark Griswold inventing a "non-nutritive food varnish".
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